A Father's tears: When a man cries does it makes him strong or weak?

A wolf howls to the moon

Whenever you cry does it mean you’re weak in a way that you’re showing vulnerability to others for you to earn their sympathy or crying for you is a sign of strength meaning you reduce the emotional stress you’re going through.

                   

Cry, Cries, Crying

These words may have their difference: past tense, present tense and future tense but all in all it means to Shed tears, typically as an expression of distress, pain, or sorrow (Oxford Dictionary).

But when can we say whether crying makes us weak or strong.

Crying as our weakness,

Tears can be a signal of cooperation and vulnerability. Tears handicap aggressive actions, as noted by Orren Hasson, in an article on emotional tears as biological signals. It’s hard to fight when you can’t see well. Tears signal to others that you don’t want to fight; perhaps this is the root of the belief that crying makes you weak?

In modern society, fighting is not the most desired social skill. Building a life of contentment requires cooperation and a willingness to be vulnerable in relationships. Tears signal a vulnerability that is authentic and powerful (psychcentral.com).

So crying can be a sign of weakness, sometimes we cry when we can’t a handle a situation and crying is the only way to reduce the stress which shows our vulnerability to life. But in a way that when they put their walls down means that they want someone to come, comfort them and gave them strength they lack.

5 reasons why crying a lot means you’re tough or strong:

1. You meet your emotions head on
2. You don’t care what others tell you
3. You know that crying helps you release pent up feeling
4. You know that crying makes you healthier
5. You help others feel more comfortable expressing themselves

Crying does makes you gain strength that makes helps you face problems head on, be confident, you’re heart feels lighter, you’ll be healthy even though you’re ugly, and helps others. All in all it can prevent you from committing suicide because you were able to release your emotions.

If crying makes us strong then does it mean men’s cry a lot because they are strong beings, not that woman’s were not strong actually they cry more than man but not as a sign of weakness but a sign of strength in a way that they were able to release their emotions.

There was a survey that woman do really cries more than men,

Fully half the men surveyed said they never cry but only 6 percent of the women did. Women’s crying doesn’t necessarily correlate with their hormone levels and those who are depressed don’t necessarily cry more than others.

The tear glands of the sexes are structurally different leading women to cry more profusely than men according to Louann Brizedine, a neuropsychiatrist at the University of California. And whereas men tend to tear up and cry quietly to themselves, women’s weeping is a much noisier and visible event (psychcentral.com).

And I have proven that females do really cry more than males when my parents were fighting over money back in 2015 when I was only 14 years old. The story behind my parents fight was because of my dad losing his job that money were no. 1 in our list of needs to survive. So while fighting my mom sheds tears while my dad didn’t even cry, blazing with anger my mom leaves the house leaving my dad and I behind.

But I can’t say that males don’t cry because we all know that we can use our fingers to count the times a man cry so they do cry, but because males omits an image that they are strong and won’t show any vulnerability but also because they are humans too that are capable of feeling emotions.

When my mom leaves I go to a room closing the lights, closing the door but not locking it and then burst crying while covering my mouth. I feel that life one more time the table turns that makes me miserable. While crying silently as I can the door opens and faint stomping of feet can be heard, I know it’s my dad as I take a peak under the pillow I use to cover my face when he opens the light. I return the cover my face which is the pillow when I saw him approaching me, but he remove it and said he wants to talk to me. I remove it and begin to listen carefully, he explain what is happening and tell me that I don’t need to worry about it that’s it’s between adult to worried about. He said he will take care of it and promise me to never stop working until I finished my studies. While taking to me I saw a sparkly thing I never knew I will see because for me he have a strong, bubbly and a good father he is. A tear escaped his big brown eyes while looking directly in my eyes showing honesty, determination and vulnerability.

For me the vulnerability he shows doesn’t reduce any good things that I knew about him instead it becomes my motivation to continue life when I thought life is unfair.

Men do cry whether it’s to show their weakness or strength but showing their weakness may means that they are letting go problems, leave insecurities, doubts and hatred behind to find their strength. Their past can be their lesson in life that they will use to live a better life.

The tears of my dad prove that he is the strongest person in the world I know, because he’s working hard for so many years and still not giving up. Since he came from a poor family he has to work hard to feed his family and to continue his studies. I always wonder does he always cry or does he hold it to himself when life was tough. Even though he’s a man he didn’t show any regrets that he cried and for me that’s what you call a MAN.

        We need never be ashamed of our tears. – Charles Dickens

Sources:

• https://blogs.psychcentral.com/emotionally-sensitive/2012/02/tears-and-emotions/
• https://www.powerofpositivity.com/why-crying-a-lot-means-youre-mentally-tough/
• http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/features/why-do-we-cry-the-science-of-tears-9741287.html
• https://pixabay.com/en/father-and-daughter-love-family-2901559/